So simple

I was talking with my pal this morning, after my swim.

I hadn't been sure about my swim. I was physically tired yesterday. I needed to skip a day at the pool and that's what I did. Felt right. Even thought that maybe -- what with the pool being open for adult swim Monday through Friday -- I should start scheduling a regular mid-week day off from the pool. Then I had a bit of a comfort-food dinner last night and, well, when I rolled out of bed at 7 this morning I wasn't feeling like a paragon of physical discipline. (Which is good, because I am not).

Got myself to the pool though. But once I was in the water, I didn't think I would be able to complete 10 laps. I just felt like I was working harder to swim than I had been working lately. plus, and this is important, there was the thing about not feeling like a paragon of physical discipline. My feeling like I hadn't been with the program yesterday sapped my motivation to get back on it today. Not the blues exactly, but it is definitely an ingredient of the blues, that thing where your brain starts working against you, negotiating with itself against your better angels, making deals to let you off easy.

But I persevered. I had a feeling that brain was at work, and I also had a feeling that the best thing to do was to work through it.

So I got to 10 laps and I kept going. I've been doing 22 laps a day the last 3 or 4 times I have been to the pool. Once I got to 10 I was pretty sure I could get to 22.

And then I kept going. Yes I did. Past 22 laps, two at a time, until I had completed 30 laps, feeling strong, and 750 yards.

Sitting here typing, I feel my arms, my legs, and my confidence that I am back on track. I came back and had a high-protein bachelor breakfast. You don't want to know. Okay, what the hell. I had a can of sardines. I like sardines. My sister Deborah, a very knowledgeable foodie, says they are really good for me. Maybe not if I have a date soon afterward, but otherwise.

Anyway, that brings me back to talking with my pal. She was at her office, a little after 9, telling me she had been feeling foggy all week, not getting much done.

Whoa, said I. I kind of recalled her finishing some big projects on Monday and Tuesday, and I also recalled that what she had done on Tuesday, which is a work-at-home day for her, was exactly what she had planned to do. I pointed this out. "Oh, yeah," she said, and I could tell that she was sincerely surprised.

"So, in fact, you have been feeling foggy and not getting much done for a day," I said. "A little different."

I'm just saying. Isn't it interesting how are brains are constantly negotiating with reality, revising our sense what we have or have not done and how we feel about it. And it isn't always a good thing.

Far be it from me to tell my pal how to think about her work, but with me -- especially on this BMGS 2.0 campaign of mine -- it really matters that I write things down just about every day, and make sure I give myself credit for what I do. Otherwise I might have managed to get in the pool this morning thinking I hadn't accomplished anything, or eaten in a healthy way, for days. I might have allowed myself to give in to my brain with the notion that it didn't really matter what I did today, because I had been drifting so aimlessly.

Instead, I had a great day in the pool, a good healthy smelly breakfast, and I have going to have some cantaloupe and toast before I clean the house a bit before Danny comes over in a couple of hours.

And I'm on track for another happy weigh-in on Sunday.

Life is so simple. Much more simple than this troublesome brain of mine.